Funny Jokes – Jokes from the community

Calm down about the Net Neutrality thing... Paying additional money to access certain sites will give you a sense of pride and accomplishment.

My wife left me because I am insecure No wait, she's back. She just went to get coffee

My Tinder bio says that I have a corner office with views of the entire city, drive a $500,000 vehicle, and that I'm paid to travel. My dates never seem too happy when I tell them I'm a bus driver.

Iamonthemoonandthereisnowheretogetabeer. Thereisnospacebar.

Little Johnny was told by his friends that adults have a deep dark secret and can be easily manipulated. Johnny decides to test it. He comes home, goes up to his mother and says, "Mom, I know everything." Mom shushes him and gives him $10. "Just don't tell Dad" she says. Hey, it's working thinks Little Johnny. An hour later, Dad comes home from work. Johnny goes up to him and says: "Dad, I know e…

My granddad always used to say, “As one door closes another one opens.” Lovely man. Terrible cabinet maker.

My son kept chewing on electrical chords, so I grounded him... He's doing better currently and conducting himself properly.

I asked my girlfriend to describe me in 5 words. She said I'm mature, I'm moral, I'm pure, I'm polite and I'm perfect! Then she added that I... ...also had a fundamental lack of understanding about apostrophes and spaces...

What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? HDMI